The awkward scale

This past week, Plaxico Burress did something which seems out of the ordinary: he shot himself in the leg by accident. Now I'm no General Manager, but wouldn't complete and utter stupidity void any major contract? This guy is an idiot and should be forced to watch every episode of Leave it to Beaver on a continuous loop until he learns something.

But imagine being Mr. Burress and having to explain to your boss that you can't play this weekend as a result of mistaking your right knee cap for a partridge in hunting season. As a result, let's take a look where this would rank on the all time awkward scale:

1. Anything to do with the words love and Facebook. I differ to my former roommate on the subject as she went through extensive douchebaggery on the issue. I think the exact quote was "What the hell?!? Do guys usually tell you that they love you through a poem on Facebook or is this guy just weird?" Ladies and gentlemen, your 2008 Cincinnati Bengals have more hope than this guy did after that incident!


2. Working with a guy who has tried to assault your family. Imagine for a moment if the Toronto Maple Leafs acquired Todd Bertuzzi (Please God no!) and put his locker beside that of Dominic Moore... I smell a sitcom!

3. Injuring yourself doing a simple household chore. This could include carrying your gun (Burress), Vacuuming (Kobe Bryant), or falling asleep in a tanning booth and waking up looking like Darth Vader (thank you Marty Cordova). These guys have kept us laughing longer then Rosie O'Donnell trying to fit into a size 12 dress. Thanks guys, and keep up the great work.

4. The McCain-Palin type event. This is where two people get together and one of them is so dumb, the other considers leaving their point of view just to spite the other person. Also see Hedi Fry and the Liberal Party, Kobe and Shaq, and Paris Hilton and any person she has ever met!

5. Nuff said: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFijzDyJnVE

And I will be back tomorrow for the Monday Night Powerplay.